In the final week of May Stegosaurus stomped up to Washington DC at the behest of his good friend Congresssaurus Triceratops, the long respected leader of the Dinosaur Congressional Caucus. The three horned faced Congresssaurus declared the matter most urgent and requested Stegosaurus come to him at his earliest convenience. Stegosaurus was perplexed and concerned; he had spent so much time in Florida this Spring that he had not been following the news. The two dinosaurs met outside the Smithsonian's Natural History Museum. They could not go inside, because the Dinosaur Hall is still under construction.

"Thank you for coming, friend Stegosaurus," said Congresssaurus Triceratops, appearing slightly distressed. "I am glad to see you. This matter is most urgent, and I must speak with you about it at once."

"What is it?" asked Stegosaurus, concerned. "Are you well?" he asked, thinking, "I hope he won't ask me to run for office again; I am happy at home in the tranquil pursuit of gardening and science; I have no ambition to govern mammal or dinosaur."

"Be at ease," assured Congresssaurus Triceratops. "I am well, the matter has nothing to do with my health."

"I am so glad to hear it," rejoined Stegosaurus. "Obviously, though, something is amiss. You do not look at ease yourself."

"I am not," conceded Congresssaurus Triceratops. "Let me begin at the beginning. On the first of this month I attended a local production here of the Broadway show Finian's Rainbow, and left the theatre humming the tune "How Are Things In Glocca Morra?" to myself. Stomping back to my Senate chamber, I then stopped and some birds in the trees spoke to me, you know they're my descendants."

"They're mine, too", observed Stegosaurus. "I'm even bird - hipped!"

"You may have noticed that the mammals of Washington DC are investigating each other for suspected ties to Russia of late," said Congresssaurus Triceratops.

"I may have heard something about that before leaving for Florida," said Stegosaurus. "An unfortunate situation. They should spend more time helping each other."

"I know," agreed Congresssaurus Triceratops, and then he continued: "The mammals are so rabid to find connections to Russia everywhere and in everything that some anonymous source has informed me that another anonymous source will investigate me for serving as a Soviet spy because I attended that particular play, which references birds, and because I spoke to birds on Government property."

"That is absurd," said Stegosaurus. "Are you sure these mammals are using their larger brains?"

"Somehow I doubt it," said Congresssaurus Triceratops. "If it were just that, I'd weather the storm as I did the year that Congress denied my very existence. But this time there's more."

"More? You're kidding!" said Stegosaurus.

"Sadly I am not. A third anonymous source told my second anonymous source that told my first anonymous source that the mammals want
my monument at the National Zoo taken down."

"The mammals in this city have lost their minds!" observed Stegosaurus. "I am so glad to have lost my Senate bid in 2008. What has your monument to do with Russia? I thought the mammals were done with their Cold War in 1991."

Congresssaurus Triceratops continued, "The triplicate anonymous source heard from a fourth anonymous source that a group of mammals were marching around my monument the other night carrying torches and chanting that 'Russia is our friend!' and subsequently it has been branded a gathering place for racists and it is hard for me to accomplish anything now."

"Does anyone do anything under their own name in this town, or is everyone anonymous?" asked Stegosaurus.

"Increasingly I think not," said Congresssaurus Triceratops, tears welling in his eyes. "I've served in a public capacity for over 70 million years though many forms of mammal government, and even before mammals were on the scene .... but I have not seen things this polarized since I was in the Roman Senate some 500 years ago. If the mammals stopped being anonymous around here and put their names to their actions, they'd have to actually be nice, and then they might accidentally solve a problem. For example it will cost $700,000 dollars to move my monument; money that would be better used repairing and improving public roads and services. They could donate money to a homeless shelter or orphanage. They could give money to universities that aid the education of their minority groups. They could stop believing every bit of propaganda they hear and read a book about me so that they know the good things I have accomplished in all my years of public service, and all that science has learned about me since I was discovered in 1889 by Professor Marsh. But maybe that's too much to ask."

"I am so sorry," said Stegosaurus. "Removing a monument is a disservice to the educations of millions of future citizens. What are you going to do about it?"

"I just don't think I'm going to run for re election in 2018," said Congresssaurus Triceratops. "I think I could accomplish much more outside these corrupt marble halls. Maybe I will join you in the pursuit of gardening and science. Have you extracted sunlight from cucumbers yet?"

"No, that I have not," conceded Stegosaurus. "Come help me anytime. I'm sure that if the two of us put our heads together we can solve the problem. I think if I could extract sunlight from cucumbers it might benefit the environment considerably. What will happen to the Dinosaur Congressional Caucus? Who will lead it?"

"I have not yet discussed my leaving with them; I have only told you. The new leader will be a choice for them to make at some point in time down the road," rejoined Congressaurus Triceratops. "Now speaking of roads, I must stomp over to Wyoming and visit with my constituents in June. I will, if you'd like stomp by Colorado and visit you on your 140 million and 11th birthday. Then, we may discuss the extracting of sunlight from delicious, delicious cucumbers."

"You are welcome to visit," said Stegosaurus. "You will find gardening and science much less stressful than mammal politics in Washington DC. This I know to be most certain."