A Congresssaurus Stegosaurus Press Confrence November 4th, 2008.

9:09pm, MST, Denver, Colorado


"Thank you my friends and supporters. My name is Stegosaurus, and I am coming before you to night to concede regretfully that I will not be your representative in Congress as the 111th session opens. My worthy opponet, Mr. Ken Salazar has handily won the day, and I congratulate him, his campaign and his supporters. I urge you to support him and consider him a friend as he works for all of us who love the state of Colorado.

Right now my future involves retiring to my garden and becoming a farmer scientist," said Stegosaurus. " I have no ambition to govern men. It is a painful and thankless office.

I would sincerely hope that the issues I have raised in this campaign wil not be forgotten. If you have something you believe in, get involved with your representative. Get to know Mr. Salazar and make it happen. Giant leaps start with one step.

I should like to thank all of my supporters, those who contributed to my campaign financially and otherwise. Celebrity endorsements from Stephen Spielberg, Jane Fonda, Whoopi Goldberg, Barbara Striesand, and the late Issac Hayes.

I would like to thank Denny Klein, the inventor of HHO Technology, which will be the future of transportation in America, saving our environment as well as man and dinosaur alike.

I would like to thank my campaign manager Mary Katherine, who kept my finances straight and made sure I didn't eat everything in my campaign chest.

I want to thank my brother Triceratops, and my friend Hadrosaurus of the Dinosaur Congressional Caucus. Someday we may still work together.

Last of all, I want to thank you, my friends and supporters, grown ups and children who believed in my vision for a better Colorado.

To anyone else I've forgotten, I appreciate you too.. I hope I haven't but you know I have a brain the size of a walnut so please forgive me.

Thank you and good night. "