From New Zealand today, Stegosaurus held a press conference to express the profound grief he feels upon hearing the news of the extinction of his friend Ray Harryhausen on May 7th, 2013.

"You will have to forgive me, I have been so distraught that I can barely move," said Stegosaurus with tears in his eyes. "I've been here enjoying my vacation with the Moas, and ever since we heard this news earlier today we have been absolutely devastated. It is such misfortune that Mammals' lives are so short !! Only 92!! Ray Harryhausen, like his friend Ray Bradbury, was an ardent supporter and advocate for dinosaurs and the megafauna of prehistory. I personally have the distinction of being the first dinosaur he worked with, in 1935, and I was also pleased to work with him in 1956. I'm very proud of that."

"I will always remember his generous compliments, praising my beauty. The 8th point of similarity I share with my brother horse. I will also miss floating forthrightly on my raft to London every June to celebrate his birthday.The Moas and I will travel to London one more time to attend the memorial for our dear friend. As I understand it, Rhedosaurus has left Wall Street in New York, USA, to join his wife who is already in London. The Moas and I will also join the entire Dinosaur Congressional Caucus there."

"It is a good time for us to be together to share our memories and love for the bright soul and wonderful mammal that Ray Harryhausen was. My condolences, the condolences of the Moa Birds, and all prehistoric and fantastic creatures everywhere go out to his lovely wife Diana and family; We all owe him and his wild, wonderful imagination a debt of gratitude for restoring the life to our fossils and his lifelong enthusiasm for all that we are and have been."

"What he has done for us, in recalling us and remembering us, we will also do. Always. His memory and great body of work will ensure his immortality, but his physical presence will be missed for millions of years beyond counting."

"At dinner one night, some years ago, someone asked us to name, in order of importance, our Most Favorite Subjects In All The History Of The World! "Dinosaurs!" I cried. Followed quickly by " Egypt! Tutankhamen! Mummies!" ....

.... Still, this late in time, my opinion remains: Dinosaurs and Tut. I haven't as yet figured out what should be in third place. Could be the Moon. Or Mars. They almost make it. BUT STEGOSAURUS MAKES IT FIRST."

~ Ray Bradbury, August 12th, 1982

In Boulder, Colorado today Stegosaurus held a joint press conference with his friend Rhedosaurus so that they could express to the public their feelings about the transition of author Ray Bradbury to a realm beyond this mortal coil. These are the statements that were made:

"The mammals of the world have today lost an imaginative and creative genius from among their species, and dinosaurs everywhere have lost a passionate and loyal ambassador," said Stegosaurus, with a tear in his eye. "Mr. Bradbury's ability to see the world each day with eyes of wonder and fascination is becoming increasingly rare in this world, and though his words will have gained him as much immortality as any mammal might hope for his physical presence will ever be sorely missed. All dinosaurs everywhere mourn the loss of one of their biggest advocates, and we share in the sorrow of Ray Bradbury's friends and family, to whom we send the most sincere and heartfelt condolences."

Rhedosaurus stepped up to the podium, and was at first silent, the press waiting expectantly. Then, abruptly he wailed, a long, lonesome, mournful cry; it drowned out all other sounds, and shook the mountains with vibrations of grief. At any other time, hearing such a sound would have caused fear. People would have been afraid .... but they understood, kept their places and wept with him.

From Havana, Cuba today Stegosaurus held a press confrence to express his profound sorrow at the extinction of his friend Michael Crichton.

"This is shocking news to me, a very sudden loss," said Stegosaurus "...The extinction of Michael Crichton is a loss to his family and friends, all of us who knew and loved him. I enjoyed working with him and Mr. Speilberg on Jurassic Park II, the movie and appearing in the first, original novel as well. Mr. Crichton will be deeply and sincerely missed by all of us. "

" I have been in Colorado lately shaking claws for my senate campaign, and the campaign is going very well. Picking up lots of momentum. But, I am very sad today. I did something I wish I didn't do, and I am very sad." said Stegosaurus.

"I had been corresponding for the last several months with a fellow from Kansas named The Flying Spaghetti Monster. He seemed like such a nice guy. Finally this afternoon, we agreed to meet for lunch. He travelled all the way from Kansas to Colorado at great expense. We hit it off really well at first, but you know my appetite .... HE was lunch.

Well, I didn't mean to, but I ate him.... all of him... except the part of him that was made out of meat-balls, I tried them but they didn't taste good. Overall he was delicious, but rather starchy and bad for my diet. Now I am so sad because he was such a good friend to me and he's gone forever.


*sigh*

From Boulder, Colorado this morning, Stegosaurus held a press confrence and made the following statement regarding the passing of the famed Italian tenor, Luciano Pavarotti :

" It is not a good morning. How terribly sad that Mr. Pavarotti is extinct; he was a very nice fellow and I enjoyed working with him on my platinum wax cylinder Stegosaurus Goes Opera ...

I shall miss him terribly. I think I'll console myself by eating a nice meal of aloe plants. Aloe plants and spaghetti. "