Today, Stegosaurus releases the transcript of his September 22nd 2007 debate with Sen. Ken Salazar, D - Colo., which was held outside the Chautaqua Auditorium in Boulder, Colorado.

Tim Russert : Welcome, and good evening. We are with you outside the Chautaqua Auditorium in Boulder, Colorado and you are about to hear the long awaited debate between Senator Ken Salazar, incumbent Democrat of Colorado, and his challenger, Mr. Stegosaurus... We are outside because one of the candidates in tonight's debate happens to be 9 feet tall and 30 feet long ! I am NBC's Tim Russert, moderator of Meet The Press, and I will moderate this debate this evening. Welcome, Gentlemen. "

Sen. Salazar: Thank you, Tim.

Mr. Stegosaurus: Thank you, Tim

Tim Russert: Okay, we will have the standard debate format this evening. When asked a question, the candidate will have two minutes to respond, and two minutes will be allowed for rebuttal. When you hear the buzzer, your two minutes are up. All right ?"

Sen. Salazar: Yes.

Mr. Stegosaurus: Yes.

Tim Russert:: All right Senator Salazar shall ask the first question.

Sen. Salazar: Mr. Stegosaurus, there seem to be some controversies in your campaign. If I may address one that concerns me most, I want you to know that I have served as Colorado's executive director of Natural Resources and the natural beauty of my State concerns me very much. Can you answer questions that have popped up regarding your environmental record? You claim to be a friend to the environment and its conservation, yet you have been photographed on numerous occassions actually eating trees. Please explain how eating trees preserves the environment.

Mr. Stegosaurus: Let me assure you, Senator, that I mean very well .....I love trees. I am a gardener, and have published a book on gardening. It's just that they taste so good ! I am 6, 801 tons, and a dinosaur has to eat !

Tim Russert: Senator Salazar, your rebuttal ?

Sen. Salazar: I don't want you to starve, but I do love my Colorado with trees. I wrote and championed a constitutional amendment creating Great Outdoors Colorado, and it is the most successful in the history of this State. My question, may I be allowed my question Mr. Russert ?"

Tim Russert: Uh, yes, Senator.

Sen. Salazar ( nods politely ) " Your own record shows that you have eaten trees and in fact gained 601 tons and a degree in HORTICULTURE CONSUMPTION I know you're a member of the Green Party, and they generally have a positive environmental record, but you...can you tell me anything you have done positive for the environment ? I understand that even your party faithful have some questions."

Tim Russert: Mr. Stegosaurus, you have two minutes.

Mr. Stegosaurus: I tried to control myself by eating extinct trees once; I went to Bedford Virginia during finals week before I graduated and tried to eat some trees that the Gypsy Moth had made extinct,, but they really didn't taste good, and, well, I accidentially knocked over some living trees with my tail or stomped on them. I didn't mean to. I'm sorry. It takes a lot to fill up a dinosaur when he's 6,801 tons. Fortuantely my failure there wasn't enough to deny my degree.

Tim Russert: Senator Salazar, your rebuttal ?

Sen. Salazar: The road to political disaster is paved with good intentions, Mr. Stegosaurus. I do not see that you have any positive environmental record.

Tim Russert: Your question, Mr. Stegosaurus ...

Stegosaurus looks at his podium

Mr. Stegosaurus Hey, is this podium made of real trees ? Is your podium made of real trees ?


Sen. Salazar: Yes, it is, Mr. Stegosaurus. They both are. So is Mr. Russert's. I don't see where that comes into the que.."

Stegosaurus eats his podium

Mr. Stegosaurus: Yes, kind of processed, but it was real trees.

Sen. Salazar Don't eat my podium, Mr. Stegosaurus ...but do you see what I mean, Mr. Russert ? This only proves my point. My opponet has No positive environmental record to speak of ! He can't even stop eating trees or anything made of wood !!

Tim Russert stands at his podium saying nothing with a grin on his face.

Sen. Salazar: What exactly do you think makes you electable, Mr. Stegosaurus ?

Mr. Stegosaurus I have 17 spiff yellow plates and a really cool spiky tail ! Would you like me to show you how I can use it as a plow ?"

Sen. Salazar:: No, no, that won't be necessary... I am a farmer. I know how to plow.

Mr. Stegosaurus: I also have the love and support of millions of children everywhere !

Sen. Salazar This is because you are our State foss... dinosaur. You have been our state dinosaur for over 20 years. I respect your position and popularity. But, with all due respect, Mr. Stegosaurus, children, I love children, but they can't vote.

Mr. Stegosaurus: I respectfully disagree, Senator. They voted for me. They sent in votes to people like you, and they counted then. If they didn't how else can you explain my status here in Colorado and elsewhere in the world ? It's good to be loved. It's good to be me.

Sen. Salazar: ( taken aback ) Point taken, Mr. Stegosaurus.

Tim Russert: We are nearing the end of time for our debate this evening, Gentlemen. Do you have any closing statements ? Let's begin with Senator Salazar. Senator, you have two minutes.

Sen. Salazar I think my experience and existing record speak for themselves, ladies and gentlemen. While Stegosaurus' lack of record on the environment speaks with a volume as big as he is. I know Stegosaurus is popular and loved here in Colorado, but I just don't think he has the experience to lead. I ask for the consideration of your vote.

Tim Russert: Mr. Stegosaurus, your closing statement, please ?"

Mr. Stegosaurus: I may not have a voting record, but I do have an Opera record ... I promise to work very hard for the people of Colorado. Everyone in Colorado who does not have a spiky tail will be given a plow, and all the trees they can eat. Please vote for me.

Ken Salazar is seen shaking his head

Tim Russert: Okay, ladies and gentlemen, Thank you for listening to our debate tonight between Senator Ken Salazar, D. - Colo., and his large, lovable challenger, Mr. Stegosaurus. This is Tim Russert of NBC News signing off from outside the Chautauqua Auditorium in Boulder, Colorado. Good night.