In mid May near the time for finals of the Spring semester, my class and I got on our rafts and floated forthrightly to the country of England as we were required to eat the trees of England for our final grade.

I thought it was an ideal time to visit my British friend Iguanodon, who was excited to hear of my arrival in his land. I did not visit with him at first, feeling obligated to take care of my studies with my classmates. Together we found a nice grove of Frangula alnus which we all enjoyed, though we were disappointed to be there too early to enjoy the fruits the trees bear in the later months of the summer. We were however, just in time to enjoy the delicious flowers that precede them. We have some of these trees in North America, introduced by mammals, but it is not common. My cousin Wuerhosaurus knows of it as it grows in parts of China; but my class and I found our grove in a lovely Sussex bog not far from the home of Iguanodon.


Next we stomped around until we found a flowery grove of Fraxinus ornus, a favorite treat of my cousin Kentrosaurus, who never fails to remind me of the reference the tree has in his Bible.

I will say that the manna advertised in that Bible is quite wonderful to eat, as well as the tree's numerous flowers. I was going to be content to reach for the lower branches, perhaps standing on my hind legs briefly to reach a select few higher up; but that was the extent to which I was willing to go. But then, one of my classmates decided to knock down a 49 foot tree with his cool, spiky tail, and we all joined in after eating the leaves and flowers that fell from the tree when it hit the ground. I decided I had to come back here with Iguanodon and share some of this Fraxinus ornus with him. I wondered how it would taste combined with Citrus bergamia. As it turned out, we all did get a few points marked off for knocking down the tree, but I admit it was worth it; that was one delicious tree.

The last tree that my class and I were required to find was one of my favorites; it was Chamaecyparis lawsoniana, which I enjoy so much because as a conifer, it reminds me of some of the extinct trees of my youth, when I was barely out of my shell. It was also introduced to the British Isles by mammals sometime last week, or perhaps around 1854. The goal for the class was to find an American tree which had been introduced in Europe, and we were successful !! The Chamaecyparis lawsoniana is native to the Western United States, being parts of Washington State and California. Now sadly this wonderfully delicious tree is under threat by Phytophthora lateralis, a terrible root disease, and my hope is that when I graduate with my Doctorate in tree disease I will be able to keep this species of tree alive.

Now we could go home to Colorado, but I wanted to visit Iguanodon, and upon hearing of my plan, my classmates asked to be sure of my location so that I would not be left behind. We all wanted to leave England together.

Thus, I did not depart England on schedule; but instead left our swamp in search of Iguanodon. It had been a while since I had visited with him, but we put our small brains together, and made an educated guess as to his location. While my classmates decided to remain behind and eat some more, I went on to the city of London, particularly the borough of Bromley where there are some monuments to dinosaurs, erected last week, or maybe just after the mammals discovered us. These are known as the Crystal Palace Dinosaurs, and the place is sometimes called Dinosaur Court. I know for a fact that Iguanodon frequents that place since it was declared off limits to mammals in recent years.

I did find him indeed, grazing by his quite inaccurate Momument; If mammals see us, we will just stand very still, and they will, in spite of their larger brains, think we are one of the statues.

"Hail, Iguanodon! It is I, Stegosaurus! How goes things for you?"

"Stegosaurus!" exclaimed my fellow herbivore. "What a nice surprise! It has been so long since I have seen you!"

"Yes, indeed! I apologize for taking so long to visit you, old friend !! I hope I find you very well! I am here with my college class studying our finals and thought I'd take an opportunity to visit with you."

" How kind of you to travel all the way from Colorado USA, " said Iguanodon. I am in one of my favorite spots, next to a Monument that a nice mammal, Benjamin Waterhouse Hawkins sculpted for me in the year 1854."

"It does not look anything like you," said Stegosaurus.

"I know, but it is still quite charming, and I do like it very much," rejoined Iguanodon. "It is very unfortunate you are not represented here."

"Ah, but I was not yet discovered by mammals in 1854; and I have many Monuments in my native land of Colorado. I was discovered early enough that the mammals consider me a "classic" dinosaur, whatever that means; but you and the others represented here, you are the real trailblazers. "

I told my friend of the trees that my classmate and I had already consumed. We both expressed concern over the root disease afflicting the Chamaecyparis lawsoniana, and I asked him what trees and foliage he had enjoyed lately.

"Sometimes I dine at Epppings Forest or Oxley's Wood; at times I stomp over to Lincolnshire to visit the Bowthorpe Oak but I don't dare eat any of it out of respect for the fact that it is 1,000 years old."

"You have a lot of acres here, " observed Stegosaurus.

"Yes, 200 in fact," said Iguanodon. "Why, I can fondly remember when this area was nothing but Quercus dalechampii trees."

"Let us go stomp forthrightly to the Stambourne Woods and see if there are any Quercus dalechampii to eat. After mentioning the Bowthorpe I am really craving some oak, but like you don't want to eat THAT particular oak out of the deepest respect for its age."

Iguanodon and I went right away to the Stambourne woods, which are part of Crystal Palace Park and heartily ate some Quercus dalechampii we found there.

We ate some of the Fraxinus ornus I had been so excited about. We dined on Caprifoliaceae , Primula polyantha, and Lysimachia nemorum. I particularly enjoyed the varieties that I cannot readily find in the States.

I asked Iguanodon,

"You seem well set here, friend. How have things been of late? I apologize for not staying in touch more often."

"No worries, friend Stegosaurus. I take no offense to your absence though it is quite good to see you. I content myself to dine here at the Crystal Palace; sometimes I go to the swamp in Sussex, just North of here where you studied with your classmates. I've been taking a low profile in very recent years. It seems the paleo artists don't draw or paint me as much as they used to in years past. It bothered me at first, but I relaxed after a time and adjusted to my lower profile status. Sometimes I speak with other dinosaurs represented here if they feel so inclined to visit; particularly Megalosaurus, who in spite of being a carnivore is rather laid back and not as much a threat to me as one might think at first. I think the fact that he's still not fully discovered even though he was the first dinosaur discovered weighs heavily on him, and has given him a sense of humility not usually seen in our carnivore friends. I've really gotten into landscaping around here and it turns out that I really enjoy that line of work. So that is how I keep myself busy."

"I am so glad to hear it, and I promise to visit you more often henceforth, and I hope you will someday come to America and visit me in Colorado. It is now time, though, I am sorry to say for me to reconnect with my class and float forthrightly home; we've all agreed to depart together."

"Very well, my old friend," said Iguanodon. "I promise that I will visit with you, and we will eat some lovely Picea pungens together. It has been awhile since I have had Picea pungens and you know they go so well with Citrus bergamia. I am British, and I do love my tea."

Thus, I bid Iguanodon farewell, returned to the Sussex swamp where I met my classmates, and we all returned to the United States without any incident. I had a lovely visit, and as it turns out passed my final exam on the trees of England. We got some points taken off, yes, but it was also noted that I had observed the root disease of the Chamaecyparis lawsoniana, and I am content.