"Recently I overheard that my friend at WVTF, Program Director Rick Mattioni, was very concerned about the environment given that the winter so far as been remarkably mild," said Stegosaurus. "I responded to his concerns with this email. I hope it makes him feel better. I love writing email."
Hi, My Name Is Stegosaurus!
I heard that you were very concerned about the environment. Well, it happens that I am concerned about the environment too. Of course I have a great deal of interest in alternative fuel sources because we all know fossil fuel is murder. Still, if you think this winter is warm you should have seen the winter about 135 million years ago. There were no polar ice caps and honestly, if a world without polar ice caps was good enough for me, it should be good enough for you too.
I remember last time this happened. I really thought I could do something about the environment at first, but I decided to become extinct instead. All my friends were going and I figured, "What the heck, if you can't beat 'em, join 'em."
I would advise mammals to guard your private property rights, and enact tax credits for environmentally responsible businesses. Perhaps you can slow down this cyclical process. But in the end, I know it doesn't sound encouraging, you'll probably just become extinct like me. So, relax while you can and eat some aloe plants. The earth knows what she is doing and it will all work out for the best. Don't worry. All the planning in the world won't stop a giant meteor from falling out of the sky and setting everything on fire. If you think its warm now just wait...
Worrying is a strange curiosity that you mammals suffer from as a result of your larger brains. I'm lucky my brain is only the size of a walnut. I usually forget to worry because I get distracted by a nice meal of ferns or maybe one of those miracles of modern technology, the Acer rubrum . Broad leaf trees are very delicious. You should try one.
I hope you have a nice day.
your friend,
Stegosaurus
Friday, February 10, 2012
Saturday, January 21, 2012
Bonjour, Je m’appelle Loricatosaurus!
Lexovissaurus et moi, nous avons passé des belles fêtes de Noël et comme prévu je suis maintenant à L’Université d’Oxford, en Angleterre. Je suis sur le chemin d’obtenir ma maîtrise d’archéologie. Je suis très curieuse et je me suis toujours demandé comment nous avons disparu. Donc je vais me spécialiser dans la théorie d’extinction massive! J’ai le support total de mon cher mari, qui n’est plus en France, il est parti à grands pas, sans détours, au Mexique, où il espère de diner sur des Cycas et du fromage.
Quant à mes impressions d’Angleterre, je crois que Frédéric Chopin avait raison. Un français qui parle à un Anglais et vise versa est comme un cochon qui parle à un canard. Étant fière de ma langue natale, je ne suis pas enthousiaste à apprendre l’Anglais, mais se serrait utile pour être capable de vivre ici dans un collège Anglais. Lorsque je me suis enrôlée, je me suis inscrite dans un cours d’Anglais ... mais ne vous inquiéter pas. Je vais toujours parler le Français ici parce que je suis très fière de mes racines. Je vais aussi prendre des cours préparatoires d’évolution mammifère (humain). Ce ne sera pas un grand défi; je me rappelle de leur parenté la plus proche, les Dimétrodons, parce que j’ai vu le tout en temps réel.
Je suppose que le collège sera une intéressante expérience. L’habilité du cerveau Stegosaurids est largement sous-estimer, parce qu’il est la grosseur d’une noix. Mais je suis prêt pour la tache! Déterminer de résoudre une fois pour toutes le mystère de l’extinction!
Lexovissaurus et moi, nous avons passé des belles fêtes de Noël et comme prévu je suis maintenant à L’Université d’Oxford, en Angleterre. Je suis sur le chemin d’obtenir ma maîtrise d’archéologie. Je suis très curieuse et je me suis toujours demandé comment nous avons disparu. Donc je vais me spécialiser dans la théorie d’extinction massive! J’ai le support total de mon cher mari, qui n’est plus en France, il est parti à grands pas, sans détours, au Mexique, où il espère de diner sur des Cycas et du fromage.
Quant à mes impressions d’Angleterre, je crois que Frédéric Chopin avait raison. Un français qui parle à un Anglais et vise versa est comme un cochon qui parle à un canard. Étant fière de ma langue natale, je ne suis pas enthousiaste à apprendre l’Anglais, mais se serrait utile pour être capable de vivre ici dans un collège Anglais. Lorsque je me suis enrôlée, je me suis inscrite dans un cours d’Anglais ... mais ne vous inquiéter pas. Je vais toujours parler le Français ici parce que je suis très fière de mes racines. Je vais aussi prendre des cours préparatoires d’évolution mammifère (humain). Ce ne sera pas un grand défi; je me rappelle de leur parenté la plus proche, les Dimétrodons, parce que j’ai vu le tout en temps réel.
Je suppose que le collège sera une intéressante expérience. L’habilité du cerveau Stegosaurids est largement sous-estimer, parce qu’il est la grosseur d’une noix. Mais je suis prêt pour la tache! Déterminer de résoudre une fois pour toutes le mystère de l’extinction!
Saturday, December 24, 2011
"There's no rest for the jolly, not on the most important night of the year for Stegosaurus Claus!" declared Stegosaurus Claus.
"Here I am stomping forthrightly around the World! I've left my cozy little workshop in Brazil to deliver toys to all the good little girls and boys of the World.
Yes, the entire World! I should hope no one questions my ability to accomplish this seemingly impossible deed, as it would show a great lack of faith in miracles. How can you not believe in Stegosaurus Claus, yet spend time reading the blog of a singing, dancing, walking, talking Stegosaurus?
In truth, Virginia, there Is a Stegosaurus Claus, and I am he! If I cross paths with Santa Claus tonight I'll tell him you said hi!"
"I will take some time to drink milk and eat cookies. Also, Christmas Trees. Sorry about the Christmas Tree part. They're delicious. I'll make up for it -- Promise. I ate the pear trees too. All twelve of them. The partridges flew away. I wish I could fly like they do! Do you know what else I will take time for? Eating fruitcake ! I have a lot of respect for fruitcake because some of it is older than I am."
"I sincerely hope your holidays have been a delight. Keep being good, and get a good night's rest. I don't want to have to pass your house by!
"If I can give you any good parting advice it is this : View the world as if you were a baby just out of the shell. Be an example of peace and good will to all, and you'll be sure to have me in your heart, even if you can't see me as I stomp by! "
"Here I am stomping forthrightly around the World! I've left my cozy little workshop in Brazil to deliver toys to all the good little girls and boys of the World.
Yes, the entire World! I should hope no one questions my ability to accomplish this seemingly impossible deed, as it would show a great lack of faith in miracles. How can you not believe in Stegosaurus Claus, yet spend time reading the blog of a singing, dancing, walking, talking Stegosaurus?
In truth, Virginia, there Is a Stegosaurus Claus, and I am he! If I cross paths with Santa Claus tonight I'll tell him you said hi!"
"I will take some time to drink milk and eat cookies. Also, Christmas Trees. Sorry about the Christmas Tree part. They're delicious. I'll make up for it -- Promise. I ate the pear trees too. All twelve of them. The partridges flew away. I wish I could fly like they do! Do you know what else I will take time for? Eating fruitcake ! I have a lot of respect for fruitcake because some of it is older than I am."
"I sincerely hope your holidays have been a delight. Keep being good, and get a good night's rest. I don't want to have to pass your house by!
"If I can give you any good parting advice it is this : View the world as if you were a baby just out of the shell. Be an example of peace and good will to all, and you'll be sure to have me in your heart, even if you can't see me as I stomp by! "
Monday, November 28, 2011
"I was back home in Colorado on Thanksgiving break from college when it so happened that I was visited by my friend Archaeopteryx. Readers of my blog know how much I love birdwatching, so you know how highly I think of Archaeopteryx as a friend." said Stegosaurus.
"It was about a year ago, you know that the news came from the paleontologists that Archaeopteryx would no longer be flying, a prospect that made us both sad, because formerly Archaeopteryx was one of the most majestic of flyers."
"How are you feeling, Archaeopteryx? I was just about to settle down to a nice meal of ferns, but I always have time for my friends. Thank you for visiting me." said Stegosaurus to his friend.
"Oh, I'm still pretty upset about the whole situation," admitted Archaeopteryx in a resigned, rather glum tone. "But I didn't come to you to complain. I just wanted to stop by and visit for a while."
"Well," said Stegosaurus. "If you really don't want to talk about it, you don't have to. But I want you to know that I can tell you are feeling out of sorts; I have a keen eye for this, having watched you on my birdwatching excursions for so many years. I'm not really doing much worthy of note myself, and I am much more interested in your welfare since the news broke that the paleontologists were grounding you. I feel bad about it. I hate to see a good dinosaur down."
Archaeopteryx sighed. "Thank you my friend. I used to soar with the pterosaurus; the only dinosaur with feathers pointing the way to the future of evolution. I used to feel so cutting edge, and now I'm forced to devolve, in effect.. Who are these paleontologists? Why do they have such an undue influence in our lives? If I were really truly bitter I'd ask you to stomp on them all forthrightly because now I'm lucky if I can hop from tree to tree!"
"They are mammals, and they put themselves in charge of all this, but it is the proper order of things," said Stegosaurus. "Sometimes I think about that myself, but I'm usually distracted by things like these ferns... or sometimes just the fact that I realize that my brain is only the size of a walnut, and I resolve not to take up limited space questioning why things are. I leave the questioning to mammals and other animals with larger brains and spend my time enjoying my trees."
Archaeopteryx sighed again. "An enviable attitude. I wish I could just be indifferent but I remember so well what it was like to fly!"
"Keep your beak up, Archaeopteryx; you're still the oldest dinosaur discovered with feathers .. be glad of that; I wish I had feathers. I've never yet been discovered with feathers. You're lucky. It really is all about perspective. Life is all about perspective."
"Your wisdom is sound, Stegosaurus. Thank you." said Archaeopteryx. "I have been feeling better since I went into therapy for my depression over being grounded. I want you to know that and thank you for being such a loyal friend. "
"I'm glad to hear it." said Stegosaurus. "Very glad indeed. Take care of yourself. Perhaps you will fly again. Who knows? But what ever paleontology thinks, I like you just the way you are."
Prehistoric Birds Were Poor Flyers, Research Shows
"It was about a year ago, you know that the news came from the paleontologists that Archaeopteryx would no longer be flying, a prospect that made us both sad, because formerly Archaeopteryx was one of the most majestic of flyers."
"How are you feeling, Archaeopteryx? I was just about to settle down to a nice meal of ferns, but I always have time for my friends. Thank you for visiting me." said Stegosaurus to his friend.
"Oh, I'm still pretty upset about the whole situation," admitted Archaeopteryx in a resigned, rather glum tone. "But I didn't come to you to complain. I just wanted to stop by and visit for a while."
"Well," said Stegosaurus. "If you really don't want to talk about it, you don't have to. But I want you to know that I can tell you are feeling out of sorts; I have a keen eye for this, having watched you on my birdwatching excursions for so many years. I'm not really doing much worthy of note myself, and I am much more interested in your welfare since the news broke that the paleontologists were grounding you. I feel bad about it. I hate to see a good dinosaur down."
Archaeopteryx sighed. "Thank you my friend. I used to soar with the pterosaurus; the only dinosaur with feathers pointing the way to the future of evolution. I used to feel so cutting edge, and now I'm forced to devolve, in effect.. Who are these paleontologists? Why do they have such an undue influence in our lives? If I were really truly bitter I'd ask you to stomp on them all forthrightly because now I'm lucky if I can hop from tree to tree!"
"They are mammals, and they put themselves in charge of all this, but it is the proper order of things," said Stegosaurus. "Sometimes I think about that myself, but I'm usually distracted by things like these ferns... or sometimes just the fact that I realize that my brain is only the size of a walnut, and I resolve not to take up limited space questioning why things are. I leave the questioning to mammals and other animals with larger brains and spend my time enjoying my trees."
Archaeopteryx sighed again. "An enviable attitude. I wish I could just be indifferent but I remember so well what it was like to fly!"
"Keep your beak up, Archaeopteryx; you're still the oldest dinosaur discovered with feathers .. be glad of that; I wish I had feathers. I've never yet been discovered with feathers. You're lucky. It really is all about perspective. Life is all about perspective."
"Your wisdom is sound, Stegosaurus. Thank you." said Archaeopteryx. "I have been feeling better since I went into therapy for my depression over being grounded. I want you to know that and thank you for being such a loyal friend. "
"I'm glad to hear it." said Stegosaurus. "Very glad indeed. Take care of yourself. Perhaps you will fly again. Who knows? But what ever paleontology thinks, I like you just the way you are."
Prehistoric Birds Were Poor Flyers, Research Shows
Tuesday, November 8, 2011
Sunday, October 9, 2011
Bonjour, je m’appelle Loricatosaurus!
Bientôt, je vais célébrer mon premier anniversaire de mariage!! Je suis très heureuse d’être l’épouse de Lexovissaurus! Nous passons de merveilleux moments ensemble à l’opéra, en mangeant du fromage, en marchant le long de la Seine ...
Et pourtant, j’ai réalisé qu’il n’y a pas que le nettoyage de la caverne et comment savoir entrer dans une salle pleine de porcelaine quand l’on a une superbe queue pointue. Je suppose que si le cousin de Lexovissaurus, Stegosaurus peut entrer à l’université, moi aussi je le peux.
J’ai pensé et pensé à propos de ce que je devrais faire. J’avais faim et je suis allé manger des fougères et du fromage. Et puis, j’ai pensé encore. Finalement la solution m’ai venu à l’idée. J’étais toujours curieuse pourquoi j’étais devenu éteint et maintenant c’est le temps de le savoir! Je vais entrer à l’université et étudier la science! Je vais me spécialiser en théorie de masse extinction et je vais devenir un archéologue!
Donc, j’ai entré en piétinent pour expliquer à mon cher époux mon plan. Il m’a dit que si c’était lui il ferait confiance aux théories de mammifère de changement du climat et des chutes de météorites parce qu’ils ont de plus gros cerveaux, et me dit de relaxer et de manger du fromage.
"Mais, " avec affection il ajouta "Si c’est vraiment ton ambition ma chère, tu as mon appui!"
Et ça c’est mon époux! Je suis très fier de lui. Après un bon repas de fromage et des rosiers au Jardin des Tuileries, nous avons décidé qu’après les vacances de Noël je devrais entrer en piétinent pour m’enrôler dans des classes à l’École d’Archéologie à l’université d’Oxford, en Angleterre. Il est un époux progressif et un novateur. Il a toujours soutenue les ambitions des dinosaures femelles à l’extérieure de la caverne! Je suis très chanceuse de l’avoir comme époux!
Lundi prochain je vais commencer ma mission de recherche pour voir quelle sorte d’aide que je peux recevoir de l’Association des Dames de la Science International ou du Fond de Développement UN pour les femmes! Peut-être je peux recevoir une subvention!
Bientôt, je vais célébrer mon premier anniversaire de mariage!! Je suis très heureuse d’être l’épouse de Lexovissaurus! Nous passons de merveilleux moments ensemble à l’opéra, en mangeant du fromage, en marchant le long de la Seine ...
Et pourtant, j’ai réalisé qu’il n’y a pas que le nettoyage de la caverne et comment savoir entrer dans une salle pleine de porcelaine quand l’on a une superbe queue pointue. Je suppose que si le cousin de Lexovissaurus, Stegosaurus peut entrer à l’université, moi aussi je le peux.
J’ai pensé et pensé à propos de ce que je devrais faire. J’avais faim et je suis allé manger des fougères et du fromage. Et puis, j’ai pensé encore. Finalement la solution m’ai venu à l’idée. J’étais toujours curieuse pourquoi j’étais devenu éteint et maintenant c’est le temps de le savoir! Je vais entrer à l’université et étudier la science! Je vais me spécialiser en théorie de masse extinction et je vais devenir un archéologue!
Donc, j’ai entré en piétinent pour expliquer à mon cher époux mon plan. Il m’a dit que si c’était lui il ferait confiance aux théories de mammifère de changement du climat et des chutes de météorites parce qu’ils ont de plus gros cerveaux, et me dit de relaxer et de manger du fromage.
"Mais, " avec affection il ajouta "Si c’est vraiment ton ambition ma chère, tu as mon appui!"
Et ça c’est mon époux! Je suis très fier de lui. Après un bon repas de fromage et des rosiers au Jardin des Tuileries, nous avons décidé qu’après les vacances de Noël je devrais entrer en piétinent pour m’enrôler dans des classes à l’École d’Archéologie à l’université d’Oxford, en Angleterre. Il est un époux progressif et un novateur. Il a toujours soutenue les ambitions des dinosaures femelles à l’extérieure de la caverne! Je suis très chanceuse de l’avoir comme époux!
Lundi prochain je vais commencer ma mission de recherche pour voir quelle sorte d’aide que je peux recevoir de l’Association des Dames de la Science International ou du Fond de Développement UN pour les femmes! Peut-être je peux recevoir une subvention!
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