On December 5th 2025 Stegosaurus Claus was at his workshop in Brazil preparing to float forthrightly on his raft to pick up Spinosaurus in South Africa so they may proceed on their annual trip around the world bringing presents, joy and goodwill to all the world. This is a routine he was very much used to as he had agreed to this arrangement with Spinosaurus for several years now.

This is why he was genuinely surprised to see Spinosaurus arrive at the door of his Workshop just as he was about to stomp forthrightly out of the door.

“Hello, there, Stegosaurus Claus,” said Spinosaurus, barely able to fit his head through the window.

“What are you doing here, Spinosaurus? I was just about to stomp forthrightly to my raft, and float forthrightly to South Africa to make sure you could accompany me on my annual trip around the world.”

“This year I decided to surprise you and show up on your doorstep to show gratitude for your continued trust in me these last few years. I know it is hard for a plant eater like you to trust a meat eating apex predator like me.”

“I know it must be hard not to let nature take its course,” said Stegosaurus Claus, “I appreciate your honesty and genuine restraint. May the blessings of the Holy Time of Christmas be with you, my friend. I look forward to our annual adventure of traveling together, provided you always remember the rule about not eating me or the mammal children.”

“I will, but before we go I must find something I can eat; something that will stick to my ribs to fortify me before our long journey,” said Spinosaurus.

“It may seem odd for a plant eater to make this recommendation, but as we are friends I will do you a kindness. May I suggest helping the mammals of Brazil to thin the herds of wild boars? It would be very helpful as the species has become invasive here.”

“A fine suggestion! A good meal, and a public service in the Spirit of the Christmas Season,” said Spinosaurus. “Pork is, after all a very traditional Christmas meal.”

“I shall return to your workshop within ten days ready to embark on our annual adventure of Peace and Goodwill. ”With that, Spinosaurus departed, and Stegosaurus Claus smiled, thinking about how domesticated Spinosaurus acted every Christmas Season. He knew better to think that Spinosaruus was perpetually changed; his nature was to eat meat, but over the last 19 years he had learned restraint in honor of the Christmas Holiday.

Stegosaurus Claus accepted Judaism as his religion, but he also kept an advent wreath beside his menorah and treated any other religion of honest faith in Goodwill this time of Season with kindness.

As he paused in reverence before his Seasonal display, he was surprised by another visitor.

“Season’s Greetings, Stegosaurus Claus!” said Tyrannosaurus Rex.

“Tyrannosaurus Rex! What a Surprise!” exclaimed Stegosaurus Claus. “Please, do not eat me, I beg of you, to recall that this is a Season of love and charity and there are many millions of dinosaurs, megafauna and mammals looking forward to my annual visit this year. I don’t want to let the mammal children down by becoming your dinner.”

“Fear not, I ate a few wild boars on my way over here; I am not planning to eat you or anyone else at the moment.”

“May I ask what brings you to Brazil during my busiest time of year?” asked Stegosaurus Claus.

“Well, honestly, I was hoping I had stomped here early enough in the Advent Season to ask you if I might accompany you on your annual journey around the World. I want to spread goodwill, cheer and love to all. I feel so moved this time of year to prove to the World that I may be a very large and dangerous predator who rules the late Mesozoic, but in spite of my reputation I want to prove that the Christmas Season’s message has a positive effect on everyone, even me.”

“Tryrannosaurus Rex, I am sincerely moved….” Stegosaurus Claus began, but the conversation was interrupted by the arrival of Spinosaurus carrying a decaptated boar in one claw, with its head in his other.

“Stegosaurus Claus!” Spinosaurus exclaimed loudly. “I know you’re a vegetarian; have you any Bay leaves or Rosemary? I’ve got a Boar’s head, and I want to make a traditional Christmas dinner.”

Then Spinosaurus saw Tryrannosaurus Rex, and he stopped stomping abruptly, dropping the Boar’s head.

“Oh. Hello, Tyrannosaurus Rex. Happy Holidays! How are things in Montana this time of year?”

“What a surprise! Glad to see you Spinosaurus. It has been a while. I haven’t seen you since you defeated me in Jurassic Park III !! Montana is a lot colder than it used to be 70 million years ago; the climate is a bit more like it used to be here in Brazil,” said Tyrannosaurus Rex. “I am actually seeking warmer weather, one of the reasons I am here.”

“I hope that in the Spirit of Christmas you will forgive me for winning our fight filmed in Jurassic Park III. Please join me for Christmas dinner, I am having a Boar’s head, and probably the rest of the Boar too.”

“Our Battle Royale was the one scene that made it worth doing the film. We’ll have to have a rematch, but after Christmas.” rejoined Tyrannosaurus Rex.

“Please, no fighting during Christmas,” begged Stegosaurus Claus, worried that the natural inlcination of the two apex predators would override any Christmas sentiment they had promised him due to this unexpected meeting of the two rivals.

“To answer your question, Spinosaurus, yes I do have Bay leaves and Rosemary in my garden. You may have some, but please don’t eat your Boar in my workshop. There is plenty of time for you to enjoy a Christmas dinner with Tyrannosaurus Rex before I must go on my annual trip around the world.”

“Will you not answer my request?” Tyrannosaurus Rex asked Stegosaurus Claus.

Although Stegosaurus Claus was not even remotely a violent Spirit, he readied his cool, spiky tail in case Tyrannosaurus Rex took the response to his question in a negative way.

“Tyrannosaurus Rex, I sincerely hope that you will not take this news badly, but Spinosarus has arrived here early for the first time ever. Usually I travel to South Africa to pick him up, but here he is already arrived, and I would hate to discourage him by asking him to stomp aside.” said Stegosaurus Claus.

“I will not put you on the spot, Stegosaurus Claus, but in the Spirit of the Season, I will make Tryranosaurus Rex a promise: If you let me travel with Stegosaurus Claus this year, I will remain in South Africa next year, and you can travel with Stegosaurus Claus on his annual trip next year.”

“How generous of you,” said Tyrannosaurus Rex.

“You aren’t afraid of Tyrannosaurus Rex, are you, Stegosaurus Claus?” asked Spinosaurus.

“Because of your generous offer, Spinosaurus, I will let Tyrannosaurus Rex travel with me in 2026.

“Tyrannosaurus Rex may be the King of Tyrant Lizards, but he also knows that I wield a cool, spiky tail, that I will use, to defend my life. I must defend myself for the sake of the young mammal children around the world who expect me to give them presents. It would break with my character to be violent, but I am thinking of the children.”

“I would cross my heart if I could reach it with my tiny hands,” said Tyrannosaurus Rex.

“Very well, it is settled!” declared Stegosaurus Claus, as he stomped into his Workshop to work on toys he was bringing on his trip this year.

Tyrannosaurus Rex pulled Spinosaurus aside and asked him in confidence, “Spinosaurus, may I ask if you can share some confidential information.”

“I am not sure,” said Spinosaurus.

“Well it can’t hurt to ask. I was wondering if you could tell me if you know what I am going to get for Christmas. I hope it isn’t another set of arm extenders. You have no idea how many of those I have.”

“You don’t want to be surprised?” asked Spinosaurus.

“Don’t be fooled by the fact that I am 30 feet tall and have teeth between 9 and 12 inches. I may be an apex predator like you, but when it comes to Christmas I assure you I am as giddy and excited as a small mammal child.”

“Okay, well, as long as you promise to keep this secret.” said Spinosaurus.

I would cross my heart if I could reach it with my tiny hands,” said Tyrannosaurus Rex.

“I have it on good authority, from the Jolly old Stegosaurus Stenops himself that all dinosaurs this year will be getting a meteor insurance policy, and the Ice Age Megafauna will be getting a comet insurance policy.”

“Oh how exciting! I need my policy for meteors renewed! I wonder how Stegosaurus Claus knows,” pondered Tyrannosaurus Rex, trying his best to look pensive.

“If there’s one thing I have learned these last few years,” said Spinosaurus, “Stegosaurus Claus knows. It’s his job to know; he always knows.”

“I shall leave you to your dinner, and head back to Montana to wait for my turn next year,” said Tyrannosaurus Rex.

“Before you go, please do dine with me, The boar you see here isn’t the only one I have; I have been hunting.“

“You mean, you would share with me?” asked Tyrannosaurus Rex.

“In the name of Christmas, I will,” said Spinosaurus.

“God bless us, everyone!” said Tyrannosaurus Rex.

"On Christmas Eve I waited up in hopes that I would see Stegosaurus Claus," said Stegosaurus. "Not because I was a curious mammal child, but because I had a genuine question for the Jolly Old Ornithischian Stegosaurus Stenops," said Stegosaurus.

"I brought a tree into my cave and decorated it, in hopes that Stegosaurus Claus would be delighted with it and consume it. I also obtained some Tree Shaped Cookies, as I know these are his favorites as well. I knew Stegosaurus Claus would be pleased with my charitable work and kindness towards my fellow dinosaur and all the mammals I could meet. But I didn't need a present, or any kind of emolument from him. I had a very specific question. Since this was the case I needed not worry that he'd pass me by, but I was still nervous because I was afraid to be asking too much of him. He's so busy in Brazil most of the year making toys for all the good little girls and boys and dinosaurs and the megafauna, even the nomen dubium among us."

"Finally about 10 o clock Christmas Eve I had a Christmas Guest. It was indeed Stegosaurus Claus himself, surprised to see me."

"Stegosaurus!" exclaimed Stegosaurus Claus. "I did not expect to see you up at this hour!! What keeps you awake I hope you do not have insomnia on Christmas Eve. Do you need some Peace and Goodwill?"

"No, sir not at all. I will not reject Goodwill, but I do not have insomnia at this time. Please eat my Christmas Tree and the Christmas Tree Shaped Cookies I have left for you."

"I would be pleased. Thank you," said Stegosaurus Claus. "I would not mind sharing."

"Please go ahead ~ I have prepared this repast for you specifically, and have been waiting in great anticipation for your visit this year."

Stegosaurus Claus consumed the Christmas Tree and the Tree Shaped Cookies with delight and gratitude.

Then, he asked rather bluntly, albeit kindly, "What is it then, that keeps you up waiting for my arrival? You aren't just out of your shell ... do you want to know what I have given you this year?"

"No, that is not why I wait. It is much more important than that."

"What could it possibly be?" asked Stegosaurus Claus.

"I have a favor to ask of you," said Stegosaurus.

"Ask." said Stegosaurus Claus.

"Well, you know how successful my Disaster Relief Agency has been over the years. We have gone to distressed places around the world and helped mammals in need."

"Yes you were inspired by our Meteor Tragedy. A worthy cause indeed. Your cause is compassionate and generous. Kindness is the Spirit of Christmas spread throughout the year."

"Well, I have thought of a way that my Agency could be improved," said Stegosaurus.

"I am listening," said Stegosaurus Claus.

"I held a meeting last month, about a month ago, asking my crew, shortly after our return from Southwestern Virginia if they'd be interested in helping or contacting those who would help us in

establishing a cold weather division of the Disaster Relief Agency. I've dispatched envoys to seek out Woolly Mammoth and other Pleistocene Megafauna; Rhedosaurus and his lovely wife have offered to

help ~~~ I am sure it will come together but I wanted to ask of you a question."

"You seek a blessing ...."

"I would not reject it but ... no."

"Than what is it?"

"I wanted to ask you if you'd like to be involved. Will you help us in Cold Weather Disaster Situations? There are some places I'd like to go but I just can't ...."

"I understand, my friend Stegosaurus. But, I cannot help you. There are good reasons. You must remember that though I am magical, I am also a Stegosaurus. This is why I live in Brazil and not the

North Pole; Brazil is much warmer. Also, I am very busy in my shop building toys for good girls and boys, and spreading Peace and Goodwill everywhere. Keep heart that the Peace and Goodwill can

help those in need without my physical presence. Thirdly, if I showed up a lot of the time for every disaster, I wouldn't be mysterious and my magic would wane. My appearances outside of my appointed

holiday must be rare and limited to very special occasions. I do appreciate the thought, and I think there are ways I can help you but not in the way that you think."


"I completely and totally understand your situation and point of view," said Stegosaurus. "I did not think of your situation with the weather; a mistake I must attribute to my zeal for my cause and

in part the result of my small brain."

"Worry not. I am flattered by the offer and I know what cause you were thinking of that I can contribute. I know this because I am omniscient for one, so I knew all along your question. My answer is

that I will indeed spread Peace, Goodwill, and most important in the situation Hope to the mammals and places you need these powerful feelings to be; I can do this simultaneously from my workshop in

Brazil while working on toys, and yet I will not be cold, or endanger the magic of my Seasonal presence. You have a good heart Stegosaurus, for all that you do and try to do. You will be Blessed by

me and by the Creator for that which you have done and all that you give."

With that, Stegosaurus Claus left me with my gift of Peace, Goodwill, and Humility ( in spite of all his praise ), and of course a healthy supply of regular, non low fat Pteridophytes.

May all who read this feel as Blessed as I do, for the Season and throughout the coming year."

Meanwhile in Brazil, one week before Christmas, Stegosaurus Claus checked last years' Naughty and Nice list against 2017's Akashic records, just in case any updates or changes needed to be made.

"He knows when you're sleeping, he knows when you're awake ..."

A few days before the Christmas holiday, Stegosaurus Claus arrived in Johannesburg, South Africa to pick up Spinosaurus so that Spinosaurus could protect the jolly old stegosaurus stenops during his annual journey around the world delivering presents to all the good boys and girls everywhere. Once Spinosaurus was prepared for the journey, they both stomped to Cape Town, South Africa to visit Sister Quagga. They found her grazing on the vast African plain.

"Hail, Sister Quagga, and happy holidays to you!" declared Stegosaurus Claus.

"Stegosaurus Claus!" exclaimed Sister Quagga. "Spinosaurus! What a surprise this close to Christmas Day! What brings you here to Cape Town?"

"Spinosaurus is coming with me as he has the last couple of years to protect me on my journey around the world, and we thought we'd stop by to visit and say hi before we got really busy."

"How very kind," said Quagga, "I am trimming these plains here to make them look nice for my own holiday coming up soon. You know how festive I am; I am always ready for a cheerful celebration."

"Quaggamas is a fine holiday," said Stegosaurus Claus. "I'd be very glad to help you but it is so close to Christmas, and Spinosaurus and I must return to my workshop in Brazil before Christmas Eve."

"Understood; no problem at all," said Quagga cheerfully. One thing about Quaggas, besides being inherently festive, they are also quite cheerful creatures.

"I can hardly wait for Christmas Eve!" declared Spinosaurus with the zeal of a young child. "I hope lots of children are naughty this year; I'm very very hungry."

"Now wait, wait, what did I tell you the first time, and any other Christmas season I have had your company on my travels?" asked Stegosaurus Claus. Then, he answered his own question. "I said you may whack naughty children with your tail, not eat them. Never eat them. Never. If you do, I will ask Tyrannosaurus Rex to come with me. He asked again this year, you know and I told him you were still coming with me. Now mind your manners, because eating Children does not exactly evoke the Christmas Spirit."

"Awwwww..." said Spinosaurus.

"Now I know you try hard, and I trust you," said Stegosaurus Claus.

"Not even one? Not even a little one? I promise to be discreet."

"Not even one. Not only will Tyrannosaurus Rex come with me if you eat so much as one, I'll never bring you presents on Christmas ever, ever again!"

"Okay. I'll do my best."

"Good."

"I'm glad that issue is resolved .... or stays resolved," said Quagga.

"What else do you need to do to prepare for your holiday of Quaggamas?" asked Stegosaurus Claus.

"The call for traditions in this relatively young holiday is still out there and I am hoping it will pick up as the years go by. Some things just start out slowly. I trim my plains, brush my coat, look festive and cheerful to everyone I meet. I believe that this is a wonderful world we live in and I choose to make my journey here and my interactions with fellow creatures pleasant. Of course my ultimate goal is to see the Quagga Project bear definitive proof so that I may become de-extinct; like Woolly Mammoth my hope is to return to the land of the living."

"You have a good heart, Sister Quagga, a good heart and good blessings come to those who are pure in heart and intent. I will leave you with a generous helping of goodwill, love, and Christmas spirit. I also leave you with the word of my ancient fathers, Shalom .... may all good things be yours.... I can assure you that you find your own blessings when you put others before yourself. Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year to you."

"To you the same," said Quagga. "May your journey be safe, and Spinosaurus remain trustworthy."

"I know what my nature is," said Spinosaurus, ".....but I too, am overcome with Christmas spirit after all these uplifting words, and wish nothing but peace on earth to all. The world needs us not to argue and must have peace and goodwill now more than ever."

"When the college semester was over, I was at home resting on break when, on the day before Christmas Eve I was visited at home by my friends Trachodon and Agathaumas," said Stegosaurus.

"What brings you to visit me, good friends? Here, let me share with you a meal of holiday Pteridophytes. It is Christmas; these are not of the low fat variety."

"Thank you kindly," said Trachodon, and immediately set about eating the meal that was provided.

"Trachodon and I have come to ask you a favor," said Agathaumas.

"What do you require of me?" asked Stegosaurus. "I will try my best to be of help."

"Well, thank you," said Agathaumas. "As you know, Christmas Day is nearly upon us."

"...and," said Trachodon, looking up gratefully from his delicious, unexpected meal, "We'd like you to intercede with Stegosaurus Claus on our behalf."

"Why would you need me to do that?" asked Stegosaurus. "Have you two done something to end up on the Naughty list?"

"I hope I may say without vanity, no," said Agathaumas. "We have... I think fair to say, met the criteria for the Nice list."

"I think you should," said Stegosaurus. "So, what's the problem? What's the concern?"

"Well, we think we've both been pretty good this year," said Trachodon, as Agathaumas dug into his own Pteridophyte meal. "But..."

"....We're not sure Stegosaurus Claus will visit us, because we're Nomen dubium"

Agathaumas swallowed a bite of ferns, and said, "We're concerned, in short, that Stegosaurus Claus will pass us by just because we don't really exist. Trachodon's teeth, "discovered" in 1856 are probably actually teeth of a Parasaurualophus or a Corythosaurus... and though there was great pomp and circumstance when I was "discovered" in 1872, when it comes down to it, I'm just some misidentified Congresssaurus Triceratops vertebrae. But the fact remains that Trachodon and I .... we've been really, really good this year and we would like to find we have presents Christmas morning just like the dinosaurs that do exist."

"You will have to forgive me, if I have not noticed the good works that you do," said Stegosaurus. "Not that I am questioning your character in any way."

"We understand," assured Trachodon; "Indeed, the good works we do, we do in silence, as befits dinosaurs that don't exist."

"This is quite proper, and admirable," said Stegosaurus. "It is proper of anyone whether they exist or not."

"If you promise to keep what we tell you in confidence, we will explain to you some of the things we have done, and perhaps you can relay this information to Stegosaurus Claus for us," said Trachodon.

"I will be glad to be of help," said Stegosaurus, "Though I am sure Stegosaurus Claus will know; he knows everything. He knows when you are sleeping and awake, naughty or nice, all of that."

"Very true," said Agathaumas, but if we were real, Trachodon and I would be millions of years old, yet in all that time, we have not ever received one Christmas present. This is why we come to you. You are very popular among the dinosaurs; you are easily recognized as one of the classic examples of what a dinosaur is, even small children love you for some reason, so if you intercede with Stegosaurus Claus for us, I'm sure he will be moved to leave us presents."

"Small children might know me, but not many would know Agathaumas," said Trachodon with sympathy.

"I would really like to be loved by small children for Christmas," said Agathaumas. "No child ever plays with Agathaumas toys because there are none."

"I could reference you both to my public relations firm, my agent at the Dinosaur and Mythical Creature Screen Actors Guild Local 14065. My agent is really big in the industry... she's an Argentinosaurus. It isn't all bad. Don't be despondent upon Christmas because you both appeared with me in The Lost World film last month ..... or maybe that was 1925. It wasn't that long ago, I know. And both of you have been painted by my friend ( and yours ) Charles Knight. You have your place in history, if not the fossil record."

"Well, you know about the times we joined you and the Stegosaurus Disaster Relief Agency .... particularly that year the Moa Birds suffered the earthquake in New Zealand." said Trachodon.

"I am sorry," said Stegosaurus. "I do not recall your having been there. I apologize for not noticing."

"No, that is okay," said Trachodon. "Remember the good works we do we do in silence. Remember too, in January of this year Julio and his children? I helped you replace his roof."

"Well! You are indeed very humble about the good works you do!" exclaimed the surprised plate lizard.

"And just a few weeks ago, the Stegosaurus Disaster Relief Agency went to Texas with Rhedosaurus and his lovely wife," said Agathaumas.
"The Moa Birds were there, too... and so was I. I built a few dams."

"You have made your case." said Stegosaurus. "I will do what I can for you both. I will say that the odds are good, because Rhedosaurus and his wife receive presents every year, and they don't exist either."

"Thank you so much," said Agathaumas. "It really means a lot to us."

" When my friends finished their Pteridophyte meal, I bid them a good holiday, and they departed with plans to help run a soup kitchen on Christmas Day. As it turned out, I did not have to speak to Stegosaurus Claus," said Stegosaurus. "Trachodon and Agathaumas woke up on Christmas morning to Christmas presents for the first time in their lives. And I wrote a letter to my agent at the Dinosaur and Mythical Creature Screen Actor's Guild to see if I could help improve their public relations. I can't think of two dinosaurs more deserving of the attention. I hope my readers will take example of the good that Trachodon and Agathaumas have done and apply it themselves not only during this Christmas Season, but all throughout the year."

"Hi, my name is Stegosaurus Claus!" said Stegosaurus Claus.

"Yes, it is that time of year again, when I leave my cozy workshop in Brazil to bring toys to all the good little girls and boys of the world! I've been watching the news lately, and decided that I might need a companion to protect me from any troublemakers I might encounter on my long journey around the world. After careful consideration, I took a stop by Nigeria and picked up Spinosaurus, who agreed to accompany me in case I should discover any children who have been very naughty this year."

"Hi, my name is Spinosaurus!" said Spinosaurus. "You had better be nice and bring peace and goodwill to all the earth, otherwise I will surely eat you alive in one bite! Don't think that you can hide in the water either! Now that science has determined I can swim, I'm even more dangerous..."

"Wait, wait, wait," said Stegosaurus Claus. "I never said anything about eating anyone. Not in one bite or two, or any bites! I told you that you could whack naughty children with your tail. Constructive lesson, not extinction."

"But, but but..." said Spinosaurus.

"No buts. The last time I checked the wisdom of Thesaurus there was nothing even remotely goodwill about eating children alive. I want you to promise me before we go any further tonight that you will not eat anyone alive."

"But my tail isn't cool and spiky its just...."

"I don't care! Its still the closest thing you have to a whipping rod, and ...."

"There are some dinosaurs that can live on Christmas trees, and dine on Pear trees 12 at a time and even tree shaped cookies," insisted Spinosaurus. "But there are some of us that need more sustenance than that...."

"I'm sorry," said Stegosaurus Claus with a hint of sympathy. "Its just that I can't trust a fellow plant eater with this task and I need a Krampus type to protect me these days. Have you seen the news lately? I mean, come on now. Be reasonable."

"I can't help it! It's my nature really..."

"Control yourself! If I catch you eating even one child alive this Christmas Eve you won't get any more presents for millions of years, maybe never ever again!"

"Aw gee..." said Spinosaurus. "I suppose I'll play along after all."


"Good, because there's a Christmas ham in it for you, if you make it to midnight without eating anyone. Tyrannosaurus Rex really wanted to go, but I knew you already had a reputation of manners by not eating anyone at Lexovissaurus' wedding, or that one year that Kentrosaurus invited you for Christmas dinner. I know you've got courtesy in you, so don't let me down, okay?"


"I'll try my best!" said Spinosaurus. "Peace on Earth to Mammals of Goodwill. Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night!"

"I shall spend Christmas this year in Utah, with my brother Allosaurus," said Stegosaurus. "With the Stegosaurus Disaster Relief Agency we are presently at 1411 S. Redwood Road in Salt Lake working at a soup kitchen to feed the poor and needy. My brother Allosaurus asked to help by preparing dishes for those who are carnivores. I told him he could as long as he promised to be a good dinosaur and not eat us all."

"I'm on good behavior because its Christmas," said Allosaurus. "I want to prove to the world that there is truth to the idea that it is possible for the carnivore to live at peace with the herbivore. There are times that we may work together to help the less fortunate of Utah."

"We do it not just because it is the time of season, but because it is the right thing to do. The fact that it puts us a little higher up on Stegosaurus Claus' "Nice" list is completely incidental," said Stegosaurus. "I know Allosaurus and I have a long history of sibling rivalry; He's been trying to eat me for thousands of years. He can't help it really .... its just his nature. You may think it a pretty high risk on my part, but don't worry, there have been times that I've trusted Spinosaurus at this time of year, and I should have an equal amount of trust for my own brother."

"Our father, Professor O.C. Marsh, would be so proud," said Allosaurus. "Take a look at the menu we're planning on."


Cheese Broccoli soup;
Tomato soup; Kale Tomato soup;
Pumpkin bisque
Butternut squash bisque.

"Stegosaurus is making garden salads which can be eaten with the soups... He's including tomatoes from his own garden."

"These were canned in season," said Stegosaurus. "We're also serving trees on the whole and half, imported! Cycads, ( Cycadaceae), Gingko bilboa, ( Ginkgoaceae)

"Those who know me know I don't eat the Ginkgoaceae out of a deep respect for its age", said Stegosaurus, "Yet I know others may not have imposed that restriction on themselves, so I gathered a few for our menu."

"Then there are those trees native to the Utah area:

Juniperus virginiana
Acer triflorum
Carpinus caroliniana
Aesculus x carnea 'Briotii'"

"For the meat eaters I have prepared a wonderful menu which consists of pastrami, roast beef, and roast ham sandwiches," said Allosaurus.

"Whole cows and pigs available upon request!"

"It's really quite tempting I know to add a Stegosaurus sandwich to the menu, but somehow I don't think Stegosaurus would like that too much."

"You're right," said Stegosaurus. "That would make me uncomfortable. It also would certainly add you right away to Stegosaurus Claus' "Naughty" list!"

"Oh! Right, right!" said Allosaurus. "The peace on earth thing. Working together. I forgot!"

"Remember charity starts at home," said Stegosaurus.

"It is a moral responsibility of the individual. Where ever you are, please think about enhancing your holiday spirit tenfold by doing something in your neighborhood to help the needy. Brightest wishes of the Season to all of you from near and far! On behalf of myself and brother Allosaurus, Merry Christmas!"

"Spectacular, Super Colossal Lights And Display Contest ! Lights and display contest!?! Oh no! My own Stegosaurus gone commercial !! I can't stand it!

Oh, well. This commercial Stegosaurus is not going to ruin MY Christmas !"

"Hi, My Name is Stegosaurus Claus!"

"Here I am at my workshop in Brazil, preparing for my annual trip around the world delivering presents to the good little girls and boys of the world. It is a very busy time for me, of course, but this time of year there's one thing I take time to observe faithfully. Many mammals may not realize that I have been jewish for over 140 million years, so this is a very important time of season for me."

"There's a reason why I am the only Stegosaurus that wears hats; for 8 days of the season I put aside my traditional red and white hat for a yarmulke to observe Hanukkah; and although Christmas trees have certainly been declared kosher, they aren't as delicious fried, so to honor the ancient traditions, I eat fried Zucchini. It's off season, but still very delicious."

"My claws make it hard to use a Dreidel for any fun; but it hasn't dampened my enthusiasm for the holiday or the history of my religion. I light my chanukkiah very carefully and I reverently and enthusiastically speak the prayers which are proper for this miraculous time:

"Barukh atah Adonai Eloheinu melekh ha'olam, asher qiddeshanu b'mitzvotav v'tzivanu lehadliq ner shel Hanukkah."


"Barukh atah Adonai Eloheinu melekh ha'olam, she'asa nisim la'avoteinu ba'yamim ha'heim ba'z'man ha'ze."

"The blessings for the apples and honey:

Barukh atah Adonai, Eloheinu, melekh ha'olam, bo're p'ri ha'etz."


"Y'hi ratzon mil'fanekha, Adonai Eloheinu velohei avoteinu, shet'hadesh aleinu shana tova um'tuka."

" For all the happiness that surrounds us, there is also immense strife in the world at this present time. I hope that you will, with me and in all sincerity wish for us and all the world joy, peace, blessings and prosperity in the upcoming year regardless of where your faith leads you. We are all brothers and sisters on this planet, and in 140 million years I have seen a lot. Don't forget to keep being good; I will know all and see all on Christmas Eve!"

"There's no rest for the jolly, not on the most important night of the year for Stegosaurus Claus!" declared Stegosaurus Claus.



"Here I am stomping forthrightly around the World! I've left my cozy little workshop in Brazil to deliver toys to all the good little girls and boys of the World.

Yes, the entire World! I should hope no one questions my ability to accomplish this seemingly impossible deed, as it would show a great lack of faith in miracles. How can you not believe in Stegosaurus Claus, yet spend time reading the blog of a singing, dancing, walking, talking Stegosaurus?

In truth, Virginia, there Is a Stegosaurus Claus, and I am he! If I cross paths with Santa Claus tonight I'll tell him you said hi!"

"I will take some time to drink milk and eat cookies. Also, Christmas Trees. Sorry about the Christmas Tree part. They're delicious. I'll make up for it -- Promise. I ate the pear trees too. All twelve of them. The partridges flew away. I wish I could fly like they do! Do you know what else I will take time for? Eating fruitcake ! I have a lot of respect for fruitcake because some of it is older than I am."

"I sincerely hope your holidays have been a delight. Keep being good, and get a good night's rest. I don't want to have to pass your house by!

"If I can give you any good parting advice it is this : View the world as if you were a baby just out of the shell. Be an example of peace and good will to all, and you'll be sure to have me in your heart, even if you can't see me as I stomp by! "

"Yes, Virginia, there is a Stegosaurus Claus!"

Stegosaurus Claus' Great North American Holiday Mall Tour 2009

Be good girls and boys, and perhaps Stegosaurus Claus will visit your house on Christmas Eve to leave you presents!!

Check to see when the jolly ornithischian Stegosaurus Stenops is visiting your town!!

A highlight list of the places on the itenerary!



Flat Iron Crossing, Boulder, Colorado

Fashion Show Mall, Las Vegas, Nevada

Westfield San Francisco Centre, San Francisco, California

Lloyd Center Mall, Portland, Oregon

Corncord Mills, Concord, North Carolina

Fayette Mall, Lexington, Kentucky

Valley View Mall, Roanoke, Virginia

Pheasant Lane Mall, Nashua, New Hampshire

The Mall of New London, New London, Connecticut

Arundel Mills, Hanover, Maryland

Westfield Annapolis Shopping Town, Annapolis, Maryland




And that's not all! Keep an eye on announcements to be made in your town!!


Season's Greetings to you and your family!!

"Late Sunday afternoon, after my final successful performance as Count Drosselmeyer in Tschiakovski's The Nutcracker at New York's Radio City Music Hall, I stomped over to Macy's Department Store to visit with Stegosaurus Claus," said Stegosaurus. "I couldn't wait to tell him what I'd like for Christmas!"

"You've been a good dinosaur so far," Stegosaurus Claus told me; "You've eaten lots and lots of trees, and haven't intentionally killed anyone with your cool, spiky tail yet this year!" I was so proud. After the meeting I wanted to invite him for a nice meal of Pointsettia Bushes, but I was too shy.

C'est le Noël de Lexovissaurus ! !

Bonjour, mon nom est Lexovissaurus ! !

Mes cousins Stegosaurus et Kentrosaurus sont venu en France pour me rende visite pour les vacances de Noël.

Je suis heureux d'avoir des invités pour les vacances, parce que j'excelle au divertissement.

Ma maison est décorée pour la saison, et je laisse Kentrosaurus mettre vers le haut, sa paume à huile avec des cloches, qui est une tradition dans son pays.
J'ai également permis à Stegosaurus de décorer ma maison avec des images de Stegosaurus Claus.

Nous sommes tous tentés à manger l'arbre de Kentrosaurus avant la fin des vacances.

Mais à la place j'ai préparé un repas savoureux pour nous . Voici le menu:


Apéritif de Ratatouille avec de petits pâtés en croûte sages végétariens, et pomme glacée carottes.

Quiche d'épinards et d'oignon comme plat principal

Tartelette pour le dessert.

Quand nous avions tous suffisamment mangé, nous avons tous décider d'aller caroling à la
campagne. J'ai choisi toutes les meilleures hymnes de louange que vous voyez.
Naturellement ils sont françaises.

O viens O viens Emmanuel

Ding Dong Joyeux Noël

Le premier Noël

Sainte Nuit

Chantons Noël

Il est né le Divine Enfant

Les Anges dans nos campagnes

Petit Papa Noël


Nous étions fatigués de chanter, mais Stegosaurus voulais que nous chantions son
hymne de louange séculaire préférée des Etats-Unis, "Les cloches d’argent''.
J'ai consenti, parce qu'il est mon cousin et je l'aime, et que je veux
que Stegosaurus Claus me laisse des cadeaux la veille de Noël.
Kentrosaurus et moi ce souci au sujet qu’il est encore amouraché des l'actrices Américaines.

Mais nous sommes d'accord que la question ne sera pas discutée pendant les vacances.

La veille de Noël, nous voulons tout les trois assister à la messe de minuit et à une mystérieuse pièce de théâtre, avant de revenir à la maison pour se reposer douillettement dans nos lits et rêver aux arbres!!!!!, en attendant la visite de Stegosaurus Claus.

J'espère que tout ceux qui liront cette lettre auront de Joyeuses Vacances.

Lexovissaurus, Kentrosaurus et Stegosaurus, vous souhaite Joyeux Noël ! !

"Its tough being Stegosaurus Claus; hundreds of small children constantly pulling on your cool spiky tail and saying " You're not the real Stegosaurus Claus !"'

"I have declared," said the jolly old Ornithischian Stegosaurus Stenops, "...that since no one entered my carol contest that the official Stegosaurus Claus song will be "Silver Bells", with "O Christmas Tree" a very close second. "

Stegosaurus Claus has eaten the Christmas Trees; he has eaten 12 pair trees. He has eaten the Holly & The Ivy green ( both full grown ) he has even eaten the mistletoe ( without becoming extinct. ) and tonight he will drink milk and eat tree shaped cookies.

... And they heard him exclaim, as he stomped out of sight, " Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night !"

From Brazil today, Stegosaurus Claus sadly observed that no one, not a single soul, entered his Stegosaurus Claus Christmas Carol contest.

"This made me very sad," said Stegosaurus Claus, "So I consoled myself by eating a couple of Christmas Tree farms. Fortunately this renewed my Christmas spirit, and I will still be able to spread cheer, joy, and goodwill throughout the world on Christmas Eve. The contest prizes will be packaged and sent to special people whom I deem worthy. I'll go back to making my list and checking it twice now. "

From Brazil today, Stegosaurus Claus announced with pride :

"Today begins the Stegosaurus Claus Christmas Carol Contest !
I am looking for someone to write a Christmas Carol about me. One to last the ages. One which shall be played alongside the classic repertoire. Just as near and dear to the hearts of people of the world as "Silent Night" or "White Christmas."

I have lived for at least 140 million years, and in all that time no one, not Franz Gruber, not Placide Cappeau de Roquemaure, not César Franck, not James Pierpont, not even Irving Berlin has written a song about me. I've done the research, and there are no songs about Stegosaurus Claus ! So, please help me out, and immortalize me in song !

The top three winners will recieve as a prize a plastic stegosaurus toy which can emit " authentic dinosaur sound" !! It is really cool.

These are the rules :

1. No filk songs. I do not want "Grandma Got Run Over By A Stegosaurus" .... I want an original song. Filk songs are too easy. If you can write music, it must be original music. Again, I want to avoid something like "What Stegosaurus Is This ?" I would like an all original carol about Stegosaurus Claus.

2. Send the name of your favorite tree, your name, and your mailing address to Stegosaurusmail AT Gmail dot com. Your personal information will kept secret and never abused.

3. The winner of the contest will be announced via email on December 15th, which will give us enough time to celebrate the song in the current holiday season.

Things you will want to know about me, to help you write your carol.

I am a Stegosaurus
I live in Brazil, at a workshop where I make toys for all the good girls and boys of the world
I visit once a year on christmas eve, and leave presents under your christmas tree. As always, I apologize in advance if I eat your tree before I leave.

You can tell me apart from the other Stegosaurids of the world by the fuzzy red and white hat I wear, very much like jolly old elf you may have heard of, but I'm a lot bigger than he is, plus I have a cool spiky tail and 17 spiff yellow plates on my back AND tail.

Merry Christmas !

ps. Also, Happy Hanukkah, because just like another major Christmas figure you may have heard of, I'm Jewish."