Monday, January 12, 2015

"I spent this weekend at the American Museum of Natural History in New York", said Stegosaurus. "I was there for one of my many public relations initiatives which have been so numerous in the last few hundred years. The job market can really be brutal when you're extinct, you know. There's not much call for work outside of a museum. Anyway there I was standing still for hours. I've received a lifetime achievement award for playing extinct as you might recall. I'm REALLY good at it they say."

"Early in the morning a mammal carrying a suitcase came in followed by 6 children. The children were delighted to see me because they were small, and small children everywhere love me for some reason. I keep making that observation, because its true. Don't know why for sure but I am very thankful for it. It was very interesting observing the actions of this mammal and his children, because he kept lining them up in single file, and then arranging and re arranging them in different order.

On occasion another mammal would stop him and they would converse a little bit. Then, he'd go back to arranging his children in various combinations.

Then, he opened his suitcase and arranged his garments within in different combinations.

This went on for the better part of the day. Finally at the end of the day curiosity got the better of me, and with very few mammals left in the museum before closing, I ventured to ask him what he was doing. To his credit, he did not seem at all surprised that I should speak to him in a museum. That's good. I really hate to frighten mammals like that plus I don't want to lose the reputation that got me my life time achievement award. I'm really proud of that.

"Hi, my name is Stegosaurus," said Stegosaurus.

"Hi," said the mammal. "My name is Julio. Pleased to make your acquaintance."

"If you don't mind my asking what in the world are you doing there, arranging your children in so many different combinations?"

"It is very interesting, how nice of you to ask," said Julio. "Did you know," my interlocutor said enthusiastically, "..... that I can arrange my 6 children, single file, in 720 different ways?"

"How do you know this? How do you arrive at that number?" asked Stegosaurus.

"It is very simple, " observed Julio. "I have used the Fundamental Counting Principle of mathematics. Using that very same principle, I have determined that with the two pair of shoes, five pair of pants and 6 shirts I have in my suitcase that I can expect to have 60 different combinations of garments to wear."

"Very interesting," observed Stegosaurus. "I don't have a good brain for numbers it is only the size of a walnut but I do know a lot of facts about myself in numbers."

"Oh yes," said Julio. "Would you please tell me this information? I am always fascinated with numbers."

"A Stegosaurus has about 300 bones," said Stegosaurus.
"A Stegosaurus has on average about 16 spiff, sexy plates. Sometimes you will see one of us with a few more than that but on average the number is 16."
"A Stegosaurus also has 16 claws, on 4 feet."
"Four is also the number of spikes that I have on my cool, spiky tail."

"Fascinating facts!" observed Julio with glee.
"Would you mind if I re arranged your 300 bones into different combinations?"
"If its all the same I had rather you not do so honestly," said Stegosaurus. "I find myself really attached to my bones the way that they are."
"This is very understandable," observed Julio. "The way they are has served you well for millions of years."
"I will tell you a fact about set theory," Julio continued, "Now there is a formula I will teach you about which can tell us how many subsets a particular set has. The formula is 2 to the power of x. X is representative of the number of elements." Julio paused to clear his throat and then resumed, "The set Stegosaurus has 11 elements in it; That is 2 to the 11th power for a total for 2,048 ."
"I did not know this!" declared Stegosaurus. "You are so smart you can teach a Stegosaurus mathematics!"
"Thank you," said Julio.

"The museum is about to close now," observed Stegosaurus. "What will you do with the rest of your day?"

"Well," said Julio, I must go to the Home Depot hardware store and buy bundles of shingles to re shingle my roof. Then, maybe at night I will solve some quadratic equations before bed."

"I think the quadratic equations are above the understanding capacity of my walnut sized brain," observed Stegosaurus. "I would be very interested in helping you re shingle your roof. If you were to translate the Greek and Latin roots of my name I would be known as a Narrow -faced roof lizard. This is why at The Stegosaurus Construction Company roofing is our specialty. "

"I would be pleased to receive the help of The Stegosaurus Construction Company," said Julio. "Thank you very much."

When we left the museum, Julio and his children decided to ride by Stegosaurus, because we all know fossil fuel is murder. On the way I asked Julio what the square footage of his roof was.

"1800 square feet." responded Julio.

"Let's see, then, " said Stegosaurus. "You must have 18 squares, determined by dividing 1800 into 100. 18 squares times 3 bundles square is 54. We will need 54 bundles."

"I thought you said you were not very good in dealing with numbers!" said Julio with surprise.

"Yes, but also, roofing is the specialty of the Stegosaurus Construction Company you know."

"Oh right," said Julio.

"I just do what I do," shrugged Stegosaurus.

"I called upon my crew which included not only my usual classmates from college but Julio as well. By dusk, we had finished our work."

"Thank you very much! I appreciate the help!" said Julio.

"No problem, glad to do it," said Stegosaurus.

"Look at that sunset," said Julio. "What a beautiful time of the evening to solve quadratic equations."

"The Stegosaurus Construction Company shall leave you to your equations, good friend. How very nice to make your acquaintance. I hope we meet again."

"Oh I'm sure we will," said Julio. "Come back tomorrow. I need to return to Home Depot to buy some paint and a door."


 
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