"It's nice to be back in college again," said Stegosaurus. "I'm up in Michigan right now, specifically the Great Lakes region looking for Mentha Piperita. One of my classmates has developed an upset stomach because he made the mistake that I made a little while back and ate a hearty meal of Lyonia ferruginea in Florida. Now we're up here in the mid west looking for a cure. I'm sure we'll find some soon. I'm glad we started now; it being late summer the season is almost over.

After class today I'd like to stomp forthrightly to Canada and visit my Canadian friend Styracosaurus. He tells me that Canada has introduced Corylus americana to its land, and I've been thinking about it the whole time. Corylus americana is a real treat, and perhaps I'll try it with a keg or two of Stegosaurus Stout.

It'll be nice to visit Canada again it has been some time since I stomped there. I'd also like to dine on some native tree species, like Abies lasiocarpa, Picea glauca, Taxus canadensis, and of course that miracle of modern technology... my favorite broadleaf... Acer rubrum !!

Looks like I'll need to bring more Stegosaurus Stout, and of course, not forget to be good and share my meal with my host Styracosaurus. He's already expecting my visit and saving me some Coffee plants which he brings with him from visits to Africa and Asia.

Yes, yes I know this all seems very routine. Sometimes the life of a Stegosaurus, eating large quantities of verdure and stomping forthrightly everywhere is just that, routine. I am content with my pleasant lot; I hope you are too. Sometimes difficulties may be visited upon us, but it is all very relative. If you think you are having a bad day just wait until a giant meteor slams into the Yucatán Peninsula .... perspective has a positive way of helping one to organize their priorities.

"I have been disillusioned with politics since my failed Senate campaign of 2008," said Stegosaurus. "I am much more content to be a farmer scientist, without a care in the world and no ambition to govern men or dinosaurs."


"I spent last week in my garden trying out coffee plants in the modern fashion of grinding and brewing the bean. The results? I don't know .... I think I like the traditional method of just eating the plant whole; this grinding and brewing I am sure will be a short lived fad. Eventually mammals will come to their senses and realize that grinding and brewing takes more time and effort than it is really worth and it really is more economical to just eat the plant whole."

"My friend Rhedosaurus and his wife Lady Rhedosaurus however are not inclined to such peaceful endeavors. They are involved in political matters right now as I speak.
It seems they have recently arrived in New York City, where they can be found occupying Wall Street. I read all about it in the newspaper before I ate it."

******************

"My Lady Rhedosaurus and I felt it was time to rescue the mammals from their own folly and join the ranks of those occupying Wall Street." Observed Rhedosaurus.

"Trust us, we will have the most sincere respect for the law while occupying Wall Street. Surely no one will fear us, for our manners are so mild. Okay, perhaps I have a history of eating policemen; but my wife and I will respect policemen as long as they respect themselves. We will respect policemen so long as they respect the law they represent. After that, they are delicious. Very delicious."

*******************

When the major media outlets reported that two dinosaurs were stomping forth to occupy Wall Street, the politicians all had something to say.

Congressman Ron Paul R - TX, a 2012 candidate for President, released the following statement: "I think its fine that Rhedosaurus and his wife are on Wall Street! They should go to the Federal Reserve!"

Nobel Prize winning economist Paul Krugman stated emphatically, "If America collapses, it will be because Rhedosaurus has not engaged in any spending."

President Barack Obama declared, "Rhedosaurus didn't get there on his own; someone else helped Rhedosaurus get to Wall Street."

Presidential Candidate Mitt Romney asserted, "I believe in the kind of America that Rhedosaurus believes in. That's the kind of America that we all want, because we believe in it."

Libertarian Presidential Candidate Gary Johnson proudly stated, "I read a book with Rhedosaurus in it once. It even had other dinosaurs in it too!"

*************************

"I am not sure how this will turn out for Rhedosaurus," said Stegosaurus. "As for myself, I think I'll eat some more coffee plants, maybe some tomatoes. Rhedosaurus may do as he pleases, but I have come to feel that the mammals should solve their own problems, and stop looking to big solutions like myself and Rhedosaurus. Bigger isn't always better, and intervention usually gives rise to the law of unintended consequences."

"If you'll excuse me now, I think I'd like to work on planting a late season crop of cucumbers."

"I have had an interesting July full of hard work," declared Stegosaurus.
The fall semester of my medical school had ended, and since June I had relaxed in my native State of Colorado living the easy and care free life of a farmer scientist. I've recently read fascinating scientific tales of a mammal who attempted to extract sunlight from cucumbers, and had been trying to duplicate this feat. Then, I heard news of a terrible wind storm called a Derecho, which caused a great deal of property damage, and even extinction for some mammals from the midwest into the southern states."

"This of course sent both the Stegosaurus Disaster Relief Agency and The Stegosaurus Construction Company into action so I abandoned my cucumber project, and my classmates and I were very busy for over a week, working with the mammals to restore order to the storm damaged areas. While the mammals worked diligently at mammal work, my class and I ate many downed trees, and the Stegosaurus Construction Company also stomped in where necessary to help rebuild mammal structures. It was a pleasure to work with them, and to help in any way we could to make the area nice for mammals to live in. "

News Coverage of the Derecho ( Roanoke Times, Roanoke, Virginia )


Photos of Derecho storm damage ( Rockbridge County, Lexington,Virginia )

"This tree was very delicious," said Stegosaurus. "The Stegosaurus Disaster Relief Agency came to the aid of the mammals who lived here, and then The Stegosaurus Construction Company rebuilt the roof of this structure, because roofing is our specialty."

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"At dinner one night, some years ago, someone asked us to name, in order of importance, our Most Favorite Subjects In All The History Of The World! "Dinosaurs!" I cried. Followed quickly by " Egypt! Tutankhamen! Mummies!" ....

.... Still, this late in time, my opinion remains: Dinosaurs and Tut. I haven't as yet figured out what should be in third place. Could be the Moon. Or Mars. They almost make it. BUT STEGOSAURUS MAKES IT FIRST."

~ Ray Bradbury, August 12th, 1982

In Boulder, Colorado today Stegosaurus held a joint press conference with his friend Rhedosaurus so that they could express to the public their feelings about the transition of author Ray Bradbury to a realm beyond this mortal coil. These are the statements that were made:

"The mammals of the world have today lost an imaginative and creative genius from among their species, and dinosaurs everywhere have lost a passionate and loyal ambassador," said Stegosaurus, with a tear in his eye. "Mr. Bradbury's ability to see the world each day with eyes of wonder and fascination is becoming increasingly rare in this world, and though his words will have gained him as much immortality as any mammal might hope for his physical presence will ever be sorely missed. All dinosaurs everywhere mourn the loss of one of their biggest advocates, and we share in the sorrow of Ray Bradbury's friends and family, to whom we send the most sincere and heartfelt condolences."

Rhedosaurus stepped up to the podium, and was at first silent, the press waiting expectantly. Then, abruptly he wailed, a long, lonesome, mournful cry; it drowned out all other sounds, and shook the mountains with vibrations of grief. At any other time, hearing such a sound would have caused fear. People would have been afraid .... but they understood, kept their places and wept with him.

After semester finals in California, ( and a nice visit from Lexovissaurus,) I returned home to celebrate my 140 million and 6th birthday. Here's a picture from last Friday of me enjoying a Colorado sized slice of cake with my afternoon tea. Where has the time gone? It seems like only yesterday that I left my shell.

I am so lucky to have lived so long and experienced so much. I truly miss the days when the earth was one continuous land mass; that made travel so much simpler! That said, my goodness! How amazing technology has become! Why,the other day I stomped forthrightly to my local coffee shop for a nice meal of coffee plants and learned that they grind and brew coffee beans now! I still prefer the traditional method of eating the whole plant; after more than 140 million years one tends to get set in their ways... but a lot of mammals really enjoy drinking it.

How amazing things are today. What amazing things will happen in the next 140 million years? Stick with me; we'll find out together!